Welcome to "Surpass Your Dreams". The goal of this newsletter is to help you recognize your potential and surpass your dreams. This month's issue will focus on discovering that life is not about you; it's about giving to others. For a free subscription, send an e-mail to newsletter@surpassyourdreams.com. A copy of the newsletter will be automatically sent to your e-mail address.

Is Life All About You?
The Top 10 Things To Give So YOu Can Take The Focus Off Yourself
Free Newsletters
Are You Ready To Stop Making Life All About You?
Last Month

I. IS LIFE ALL ABOUT YOU?

Most of us get in trouble when we focus on ourselves. This becomes our opportunity to worry about our aches and pains, what's not working in our lives, and how other people have it so much better than we do. What a waste of time. You are an awesome human being with many strengths. If you only took the time to listen, you would learn that your friends can't stop raving about you.

So why can't we see it? Because we are focusing inward. By focusing inward, we lose out on what's going on around us. We miss all the great things about the world and the part we play by making a difference.

Are you unhappy with your life? Do you feel that something is missing? Do you think that if you get the bigger house, the nicer car, the job with more money that your life will finally have some meaning? You are looking in the wrong place.

One key to fulfillment is giving to other people. Sharing ourselves with others gives us satisfaction, peace of mind, and a reason to get out of bed every day. It is the reason we were born, and the only legacy we can leave behind.

So what does giving have to do with living your dreams? (Some of you may be asking yourselves). Our dreams are fulfilled though contributing to others. For example if you want to be a doctor, you will bring health and comfort to your patients; if you want to be a musician, you will bring the gift of music to other people's lives; if you want to be a pilot, you will give the gift of freedom through flying.

When you attain your dreams, you bring your love and passion into the world by doing something that you love. When you are happy, then so are the people around you. When you are excited, then the people around you get excited. This propels them into action towards doing something that they love, thus bringing another wonderful thing into the world.

So, what are you committed to? Are you committed to feeling sorry for yourself or are you committed to making a difference not just your own life, but in the lives of others? Once you get out of your own way, then there is nothing that you can't accomplish. As your reach the end of the column you may ask, "what about me?" Life is bigger than you so you must approach it that way. It may be hard in the beginning, but once you get used to it, you will not be able to go back to living any other way.

II. THE TOP 10 THINGS TO GIVE SO YOU CAN TAKE THE FOCUS OFF YOURSELF

1. Your Time.
   How many of you are too busy with you own lives to give your time to others? Being busy is an excuse and a reason not to go out of your way. People need you and love you. They want to see you. Let them in. Let them have time with you.
2. Your Support.
   How many of you really support the people you in your life? What I mean by support is encouragement and reasons to try something new, not 10 different reasons why it won't work. Just because it didn't work for you, doesn't mean it won't work for them. And, just because it didn't work for them in the past, doesn't mean that it won't work this time. There's nothing better than telling a person that they can do whatever they want in this world.
3. Your Acceptance.
   This may be a toughie for some of you. This means unconditional love and the ability to love someone for who they are and not what you want them to be. It means giving up how you think there life should go, and accepting them for what they want to do with their lives. This is the greatest gift that you can give to the people in your life.
4. Your Attention.
   How many of you really listen to the people in your life? For everyone who just said "of course I do", then why are the people in your life asking you to repeat what they just said? It's because they know that you didn't hear them. Take a few minutes, stop what you are doing, and focus on the people that you love. Aren't they worth it? And who knows , you may even learn something that you thought you already knew.
5. Your Forgiveness.
   Forgiving people for past mistakes and hurts is one of the greatest gifts you can give them. After all they are only human. Plus, I'm sure that you haven't been the perfect human being either. Keeping hurt and anger in your life is just an excuse not to get close to people for fear that they will hurt you again.
6. Your Patience.
   How many of you can't even be with the people you love because they are taking too long to tell a story or are taking longer that "you think" to complete a project that you thing should take to less time to get done. How do you know that there isn't a better way to do something if the people around you always have to do it your way? Having patience with people shows them that they are respected and loved. Isn't this a great gift to give for the holidays?
7. Your Love.
   People want to know that are special in your life and that you care about them. If there are things that are keeping you from loving them such as conversations that you want to have with them, but you afraid, my advice is to say it. Sometimes you have to take a risk to achieve an open and rewarding relationship. Take the risk and give your love.
8. Your Ideas.
   Sometimes people want to move forward in their lives but they don't know how. You may know something that they never thought of. And who knows, your ideas may change somebody's life. So go ahead, don't be afraid to share what you know.
9. Your Smile.
   There is nothing better that entering a room and seeing someone smile when you walk in. Right then and there you know that your presence makes a difference in their life. A smile is easy. You just grin upward. Plus, you burn many more calories than from frowning.
10. A Hug.
    Human touch warms the heart and keeps us connected. In addition, it doesn't take much effort, it costs nothing, and it makes someone's day. Couldn't you find time in your schedule to hug someone you love today?

Note: Every month, I use a top ten from someone else. This month, through the advice of someone I love, I decided to write my own. This is my gift to you.

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Taking action towards living a life you love takes courage and a belief in yourself. It also means getting out of your own way so you can make a difference is other people's lives. There is nothing more fulfilling than doing something for someone else.

If you are ready to ask for help in living your dreams, then Personal Coaching may be right for you.

For a Free 30-minute Telephone Coaching Session, call me at (516) 432-2440, or send an e-mail to info@surpassyourdreams.com. This session will give you the opportunity to see first hand if a personal coach is right for you. My web-site is at http://www.surpassyourdreams.com

Last month's newsletter focused on discovering if you are living your dreams by yourself.

This is a question we should all ask ourselves. Why? Because your dreams were not meant to be accomplished alone. Life is so much better when we have people around who love and support us. You might be successful, have all the worldly possessions that you desire, but no one can truly be fulfilled without friends.

Letting people contribute to you is the greatest gift that you can give them. All we want to do is make a differences in people's lives. Letting people in not only brightens their day, it brightens your day too.

Friendships are the windows to our soul and our lives are so much better because of them. So, share your dreams with a friend today!

To read this issue, as well as other past issues, check the newsletter archive list at the top of the page.

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Have a great month!

Deborah

Copyright © 1999, all rights reserved. Permission is granted to reproduce, copy or distribute text from the newsletter or the content in its entirety so long as this copyright notice and full information about contacting the author (Deborah J. Brown) is attached.

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