Welcome to Surpass Your Dreams. The goal of this newsletter is to help you recognize your potential and surpass your dreams. This issue is dedicated to implementing change when you are ready.

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1. Are You Past "I Should" And Now Onto "I'm Ready?"
2. Top Ways To Bring Change Into Your Life When You Are Ready
3. Would You Like To Be Interviewed For A New Book?
4. Free Virtual Event To Learn About Personal Coaching
5. Great Resources
6. Last Month
7. Register To Win A Free Month Of Personal Coaching

I. ARE YOU PAST "I SHOULD" AND NOW ONTO "I'M READY?"

Last month, I focused on making changes for the wrong reasons; making them because you think you should, and not because you want to. Many of you wrote and told me that you were doing this exact thing. You said you were tired of having things in your life that did not work anymore. You wanted to change for yourself-not because the people in your life or society expected you to. You just weren’t sure where to begin since you’ve been doing things the same way for such a long time, that they became who you are.

Change is not easy, no matter what the reason is for making the change. I personally have a hard time implementing change unless I can’t take the old behavior anymore. And, I think I should know better because it’s what I preach to other people. Being the carrier of the motivational message doesn’t always make change easy for me either. I struggle with how to lose weight, as food is one of my main comforters in life. Food allows me to escape from thoughts I’d rather not think about. And, it’s the only way I know how to socialize with people.

So how do you implement change? First you have to want it. This is the crucial first step and with this step brings the pathway to freedom. After you decide you want to change, then you must decide that you are ready for change. Once you are ready, you can achieve it. I know that this is something you may have heard one thousand times before, but it really works. When you want it, and you are ready, it is possible. This is where you begin.

So what do you do next? You begin with something small. A first step. A small step. Just something that will get you moving. Maybe a phone call, a letter, or an e-mail. Once you begin, the world is yours. You just have to start somewhere.

So what action will you take today? You now have the will, you just need the momentum. You deserve to be happy and you deserve to have change in your life. It starts with you. Are you ready to begin today?

II. TOP WAYS TO BRING CHANGE INTO YOUR LIFE WHEN YOU ARE READY

Change is possible. The most important aspect of change is being ready. Without this, change is unattainable.

Answer these awareness questions for yourself: Do you blame others? Do you resist growth because of the emotional pain you might experience? Do you give your power away? Do you have self-limiting beliefs? If you say “yes” to any of the above and you are ready to change, the following steps are for you.

1. Take responsibility for what you think and do.

It is easy to be a victim in our society. But, only you can create the life you want and no one else. By being responsible for what you think and do, you are giving yourself the power to be the real you.

2. Listen to the people you trust.

If you want to find out more about yourself, ask someone who will be honest with you-someone you admire. Ask them specific questions about their perceptions of you. What do they think you need to change? If you want to know the truth, ask, be quiet, and listen. Be willing to accept what they have to say.

3. You can teach an old dog new tricks.

Stop living your limitations and making up excuses for things that you think you can’t change. (Like there are outside forces conspiring against you!) Be open to learning new behaviors. Let them in.

4. Start out small.

Change does not happen overnight. It takes one step at a time for new behavior to happen. Every day you have choices in front of you. Pick a behavior you want to change and go small. Is this new behavior going to make your life better? If so, continue with that new behavior before you start another one. Soon you will be see that your life is making a turnaround.

5. Be your own rescuer.

It is easy to want to be cared for. Having someone else making all the decisions can be tempting. There are people in the world that just love to rescue others. The problem is that when they rescue you, they take your power along with them. By being your own rescuer, you can take control of your life and your power.

6. Know that you will still have friends.

The illusion is that if you change, then the people you care about will not be there for you anymore. The best people to have in your life are the ones who love and accept you for being your new self. Cherish these people everyday!

7. Feel your pain and don’t run away from it.

It is hard to be in emotional pain. You look for a quick fix so you don't have to deal with it. Unfortunately, feeling the pain is essential so you can let go of it. You need to find avenues of letting go. Maybe it is a physical activity where there is a lot of yelling; going into a room and closing the door and crying until another tear will not come out; sitting with someone and just talking; or writing thoughts in a journal. By feeling the pain, you can release it and move on.

8. Release emotional pain.

What you resist, persists. You may be comfortable in your victim role but change is empowering. The only way to get to the other side is to walk towards it. When you walk towards growth you will always come up against chaos. Unfortunately chaos is what usually prevents us from wanting to go to the other side. It can be harsh at times. The key is that you cannot change without feeling some pain first.

9. Free yourself from your self-limiting beliefs.

Giving yourself negative self-talk can be very dangerous because you’ll end up believing it. Sometimes you can be your own worst enemy. Start a positive internal dialogue instead. Tell yourself that you can do it. Realize that growth comes from believing how phenomenal you really are. As Nelson Mandela once said, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world.'

10. Don't wait to see what others are doing; act on your own convictions.

The world will be a better place if you act on your own convictions. There is no alternative to being you. Stop trying to be someone else. Accept your strengths and limitations. Dream your dreams, the live them. The world will then open its arms and embrace you.

About the Submitter: This above was written by Margot Robinson. Margo can be reached at pathways@vnet.net.

III. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE INTERVIEWED FOR A NEW BOOK?

Do The Sentences Below Describe You?

Responsible, motivated, intelligent, positive, and driven. You have spent many years building your career, but you have taken very little time for yourself.

You talk to people but you feel like they are not listening to you. You want loving, intimate relationships with the people around you yet you are unsure how to obtain them. (Even if you are married!)

ARE THESE THINGS THAT YOU ARE DEALING WITH TODAY?

1. Have trouble getting people to listen to you
2. Have trouble setting boundaries and asking others to meet your needs
3. Know that something’s missing in your life, but unsure what to do about it
4. Feeling guilty about the past
5. Want a healthy intimate relationship
6. Want to learn how to communicate better
7. You want to be happy!!!

I am writing a new book about how people can get others in their lives to listen to them. I am also focusing on how to build self-esteem, be happy, and finally accept who you are. My readers will be people like you who are up for the challenge and are ready to make changes in their lives even if you don’t know how to. The book will also try to answer the age-old question of HOW TO HAVE IT ALL!

If you are interested in being interviewed for this book, please send an e-mail to info@surpassyourdreams.com with the words BOOK in the subject line. Please include an e-mail address and phone number where I can reach you. Each interviewee will receive a FREE copy of the book when it is published.

This is your opportunity to make a difference in the lives of others. I appreciate you taking the time to read this section.

IV. FREE EVENT TO LEARN ABOUT PERSONAL COACHING

I will be hosting a FREE online chat where I will be answering your questions about what personal coaching is and how it can help you.

The chat is titled "Meet The Coach-Is Personal Coaching Right For You? and is taking place on January 17th from 9-10pm EST.

You Will Find Out:

1. What Personal Coaching is?
2. How it is different from therapy?
3. Why it works so quickly?
4. How it can help take your life to the next level?
5. If a coach is the next step for you?

Space is limited so please register by sending an email to internet@mail.vii.com with “Register To Meet The Coach” in the subject line. Once you register, you will be sent information on how to access the chat online. Register to attend today!

I am bringing my knowledge and expertise from coaching close to 50 clients with approximately 1,500 hours of coaching experience to this event.

If you have any questions, please send an e-mail to info@surpassyourdreams.com

I look forward to seeing you there!

Would you like to have your newsletter, e-zine or resource listed here? Please send your name, e-mail address and 1-2 sentence description of your resource to info@surpassyourdreams.com. If I feel my readers will benefit from it, I will be happy to list it.

1. Tried self-help books, tapes and seminars but didn't get what you wanted? FREE five lesson class reveals why self-help works, why it doesn't work, and what you can do to improve the results you produce. To enroll, visit: http://www.lifechangetips.com/t.cgi/102366

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3. Subscribe to Discovering Your Passion, a daily ezine written by Julie Jordan Scott, Life Purpose Coach. Julie’s ezine is for action oriented people who want to live passionately everyday. Subscribe via email at discoveryourpassion-subscribe@egroups.com or at her website at http://www.5passions.com/subpage.html

4. RealityShifters News is a free monthly ezine dedicated to sharing information about the ways our thoughts and feelings change the physical universe. View past issues and subscribe to the ezine by visiting
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VI. LAST MONTH

Last month’s issue was dedicated to how to make New Year’s Resolutions that stick.

Ok, it’s one year later and it’s time to look back on the resolutions you made last year. How did you do?

Why do we bother making these promises to ourselves year after year with little chance of success?

To read this issue, as well as other past issues, check the newsletter archive list at the top of the page.

VII. REGISTER TO WIN A FREE MONTH OF PERSONAL COACHING

To enter yourself into a drawing to win a FREE MONTH OF PERSONAL COACHING, please visit my home page and scroll down the page to locate the free coaching button to submit your information. Winners are selected monthly, and will be notified by e-mail.

Personal Coaching provides you with easy, quick ways to implement positive change in your life. You don’t have to be held back by your own thoughts anymore. You can be happy and you can live a life you love.

Winners are selected monthly, and will be notified by e-mail.

LAST MONTH’S WINNER WAS KARL BORRIS!!!!!!

Good luck!

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Have a great month!

Deborah Brown-Volkman, Author and Writer
Brian Volkman, Editor

Copyright © 2000, all rights reserved. Permission is granted to reproduce, copy or distribute text from the newsletter or the content in its entirety so long as this copyright notice and full information about contacting the author (Deborah J. Brown) is attached.

Deborah J. Brown, Personal Coach and Motivational Speaker
info@surpassyourdreams.com
http://www.surpassyourdreams.com
212-586-0787

Brian Volkman
brianonline@worldnet.att.net

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